I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox, informing me that I can have sex at 68. I’m so happy, because I live at number 72. So it’s not too far to walk home afterwards. And it’s the same side of the street. I don’t even have to cross the road! ~~~~~ Answering machine […]
Sometimes, you come across items in the news that are just as funny in real life as any joke. Here’s a news story about a man who wound up accidentally shooting himself. Fight over speeding car ends with Virginia man shooting self in groin, police say A man apparently speeding in Norfolk, Va., accidentally […]
The State of Illinois requires all state employees to take a mandatory ethics test each fall. It is usually a supreme waste of time and the results are meaningless. Here’s a little Dilbert cartoon about ethics test that is pretty good. Cartoon belongs to official copyright holder.
Here are another group of “blonde” jokes for your enjoyment! KNITTING A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his […]
I ran accross this little meme on Facebook and felt it was worth sharing. Are you one of those lazy people?
I was in downtown Champaign for lunch and noticed this car parked on Main Street. I just had to take a few photos to share with the world. I was going to wait around to see what the driver looked like, but I really didn’t want to find out!
Over time, neighborhoods change. Some get better, some get worse. Here are some indicators that your neighborhood might be getting worse, and that it might be a good time to move! You Live in a Bad Neighborhood if… You take your kids to day care and they have added extra security! You go to […]
Condom History Okay, this is a bad joke, but nevertheless, it will make you laugh. It may be a bit politically incorrect for some of you, but that’s part of what makes it funny! I’ve always been a student of history but I didn’t know this. In 1272, the Arabic Muslims invented the condom, using […]
Another great reason to have a dog….. This morning I went to Social Security to sign my dogs up for welfare. At first the lady said, “Dogs are not eligible to draw welfare.” So I explained to her that my dogs are mixed in color, unemployed, lazy, can’t speak English and have no frigging clue […]
THE BOTTLE OF WINE For all of us who are married, were married, wish you were married, or wish you weren’t married, this is something to smile about the next time you see a bottle of wine: Sally was driving home from one of her business trips in Northern Arizona when she saw an […]